Perfect Windows for Glory

While I was going through a mini Bible study with about ten other people, we began discussing perfectionism.  I wonder if everyone struggles with some degree of perfectionism, since it seemed that everyone in that room did.  Interestingly, the lesson paired perfectionism with fear.  Is it because we fear failure that we strive so hard to be perfect?  And why do I have such a fear of failure?  Is that based on pride…what others might think?

Someone called perfectionism a sin, which surprised me a bit. I have always seen it as a bit obsessive, but more good than bad—something that we roll our eyes about and need to relax at times, but not a sin, surely!  After all, it produces some very good work!  I was mulling that this morning and realized that in fact, perfectionism was the basis for the original sin!  In Genesis 3:5, the tempting serpent used the words, “You will be like God,” and how could anything be more God-like than perfection?

Somehow it had never entered my consciousness that not only is perfection impossible, but it is also an attempt to become God.  When we are unable to accept our own work as good enough, aren’t we actually saying that we are dissatisfied with what God has given?  Hebrews 13:5 says to be content with what you have, for God will never desert or forsake you.  2 Cor 12:9 says, “My grace is enough for you, for my power is perfected in weakness.”  God gives us weakness on purpose, so that His perfect power can shine through it.  He loves for His grace to cover our imperfections!

Lord, remind me to focus on pleasing YOU,
not other people.
Help me to realize that the gaps
where I am unable to achieve perfection
are actually windows for Your glory to shine through!

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A New Year Without Fear

Since I have avoided any and all goal-setting for many years, I am tentatively *considering* sticking one little toe in the water. And I think I must explain WHY goal-setting is such an anathema to me. In the past, I have seen it as a surefire way to guarantee failure. I think that earlier in my life, I set ridiculously impossible goals, then beat myself up because I failed them so badly. In fact, I can remember times when I decided to get organized, spent time and money setting up a system, then never even used it for a day. It sat there for weeks, mocking me.  I have so many failed goals in my past that I simply learned to avoid and despise setting goals.

And that is all about fear.  I feared to set any goals because I didn’t accomplish the goals I set.  And of course, setting no goals made me unlikely to accomplish things.  But even right now I can feel a little tingle of that old fear…just to remember this failing of mine makes me conscious of its cold breath on my neck.  “Goals” is still a word that invites some trepidation in my heart.  And honestly, I feel a prickling of vulnerability as I admit this…I’m rather afraid that even speaking of it might lead to backsliding because in my past,  Goals equaled Failure.  So I’m still not quite ready to jump into “goal-setting.”  No more G-Word.

I read back over the words above and I see a lot of angst–something that I really want to step away from.  This past year has been a process of slogging through that muck and gradually, carefully, one tiny step at a time, blazing a path OUT of the swamp.  And praise be to GOD, I have seen progress!  Truly, I have.  There are signs that maybe the ground is firming up under my feet.  But it still feels a little bit fragile, as if I am still not 100% sure this is possible.  
I just read in Lara Casey’s book Cultivate a different wording that is more friendly to me:
  • One year from now, I want to know I …
  • I want to look back and see more _______ and less ________.
  • I want to have chosen ________ over _______.
  • I want to have cultivated…
Somehow that is nice. It sets a tone for future fruitfulness without putting so much pressure on today. So my plan for today is to continue the baby steps I have begun.  I have come up with a few answers for the questions above, and while they may not be big and important,  they also don’t inspire fear.  They are small things, things I am doing already.  I’m not planning to re-create my life, but simply to build on the foundation that is here.  Without fear.  Because it is truly God who is doing the building.

I am very grateful for how well 2017 has gone, and I am excited to see how God grows me in 2018.  Make me fruitful, Lord!

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Made Alive!

Col 2 13

I was dead.  In my sin.  I was wrapped in myself, completely enfolded in my excessive, unnecessary flesh, and Jesus gave me new life.  He had already forgiven all my sin, piling it on Himself during that time on the cross, and He poured life—new, vigorous, vibrant life—into me.

When I was born into this world, I had no choice in the matter.  I didn’t participate in my conception, made no decision about when, where, or how I would be born, and it was much the same when Jesus took on my deadly sin and gave me new life.

He poured His own life into me, quickening a vital core within the deadness of my flesh.  He knows that I am still surrounded by the products of my birthing, that excess decaying flesh, and He is lovingly and carefully removing it, little by little revealing the life that He has given.

Thank you, Jesus, for life.  Together with You.

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The Ransom

In today’s world, we mostly use the word ransom in connection with kidnapping. The kidnapper has taken a hostage and demands a ransom.  When I read that God “paid a ransom” to buy me back from sin, it bothered me.  A lot.  If God is all-powerful, how can Satan have Him over a barrel, demanding a ransom in order to return me to my rightful Master?  Was I kidnapped by Satan so that he could manipulate…GOD?  The God of the universe is surely above being exploited by one of His created beings!

Of course, the problem is in the continual evolution of language.  Though the word ransom today implies coercion and a forced payment, a better analogy would be one that was more common a few centuries ago–the indentured servant.

There were many people who found themselves indebted to the point of no return and essentially sold themselves as slaves in order to fulfill that debt.  Once in that system, it was not uncommon to find that there was no way out–the debt was simply too huge to be paid.  The only way to find liberty again would be if some good master had mercy and, after paying for you, set you free.

I was in a similar situation.  There was a debt of sin that surrounded me, towered above me…more than I could ever pay for.  And God in His mercy bought me.  And set me free.

The ransom wasn’t demanded.  God was not bullied or intimidated.  He simply saw my need, my helplessness.  And He set me free.  Not because He was forced, but because of His kind mercy.

God, who owns all riches, gave His most precious possession, His Son, the biggest ransom ever paid,

For me.


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It’s All About Sin

 Having greeted them, he showed them his hands and his side. The talmidim [disciples] were overjoyed to see the Lord. 21 Shalom aleikhem! [Peace be with you!]” Yeshua repeated. “Just as the Father sent me, I myself am also sending you.” Having said this, he breathed on them and said to them, “Receive the Ruach HaKodesh [Holy Spirit]!” If you forgive someone’s sins, their sins are forgiven; if you hold them, they are held.”     —John 20:20-23  Complete Jewish Bible

I had never thought about it until this morning, but it’s remarkable how Jesus got straight to the point here.  When we read this passage, we are quite carried away by the thought of what it was like to see Jesus -alive!- after knowing without any doubt that He was dead.  But rather than dwelling on that most astonishing miracle, Jesus moved on.  He immediately told His disciples what to do next.  He sent them out, with His peace and the power of the Holy Spirit, and what did He send them to do?  Talk about sin!

Sometimes we forget how desperate we were without Jesus.  Jesus didn’t come to raise us to greater enlightenment, to make our lives easier, to empower us, to make us happy.  Jesus came because we were drowning in the pit–the toxic pit of our own sins!  

Jesus is not a cheery, sanitized, beam-me-up getaway from the mundane dreariness of this world.  Instead, He is the only hope, the hand that stretches out toward me above the quicksand, the strength that grasps hold when my frantic flailing is only dragging me deeper and deeper.

The cesspool we have fallen into is one of our own making, but we cannot possibly make our own way out.  There is no way out as long as we are continually adding to the sin that is drowning us.  The only way to emerge from the abyss is for Someone to take away the sin that is pulling us down.  And on the cross, Jesus accepted all the sins of the entire history of humanity–all those who choose to allow Him to bear them–and He took away their power over us.

An unimaginable weight…He bowed beneath the quicksand of all the sins of all the people of all time, and by his sinless perfection, they were nullified.  My sin dragged him down so that He, and then I, could be lifted up into new life.

It was ALL for sin.  That’s why He came, why He was needed, what it’s all about.  
The gospel–the Good News–is all about Sin.
Because Sin in the only barrier between me and the Father.

Freeing us from sin is the Essence of the Gospel of Jesus Christ.

Yes, it’s simple.  But it’s vital.  At this pivotal moment in history, Jesus gave His disciples an assignment:  Make sure people understand about sin.  Help them to let go of it.

Because that is where the new life–the true life, the life we were created to live–begins.

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Pruning–the Cuts that Clean

I am the true vine, and My Father is the vinedresser.Every branch in Me that does not bear fruit, He takes away; and every branch that bears fruit, He prunes it so that it may bear more fruit. You are already clean because of the word which I have spoken to you.                                                                                                                 John 15

I just discovered that prune in verse 2 and clean in verse 3 are forms of the same word! Somehow to me it was a striking thought.  You are already pruned.  I don’t know if you have ever pruned a tree or vine, but it seems a little violent if you think about it.  After all, you are actually cutting off pieces of a living thing.  It can be a little unnerving to think that God’s version of “clean” involves cutting things away.

It’s not too difficult to cut off dead or diseased limbs, but sometimes pruning involves cutting off a branch that looks quite healthy.  And THAT, my friends, is hard to do.  Why would you ever cut off something that seems good and productive?  Well, according to, you need to thin the branches to allow light and air into the canopy, and you don’t want multiple branches competing with one another.

A friend of mine had a couple of apple trees planted in her back yard and decided to consult with a local orchard owner on the best way to prune them in order to bear the most fruit.  As she stood considering her trees, she realized that if she pruned them the way she had been instructed, that they would have a completely different shape.  She eventually decided that the way they looked mattered more to her than their productivity, so she pruned them to make them pleasing to the eye.

God, however, doesn’t handle


Old apple trees sometimes remind me of gnarled arthritic hands.

things that way.  God sees not as man sees, for man looks at the outward appearance, but the Lord looks at the heart. (1 Sam 16:7)  When God prunes, He knows exactly what needs to be stripped away in order to bring us to full fruit-bearing.  His pruning may not look the way we expect – we may not like the way it looks at all – but He knows the perfect cuts to make, which branches must go, so that the others can flourish as He intends.  Even when a branch is bearing fruit, sometimes the tree as a whole is better off without it!


Sometimes those cuts hurt.  The sap may run for a time before healing over, and you may think that it just doesn’t look right.  But trust that God, the master gardener, knows exactly how to make you bear the very best fruit. His cuts are clean, and produce fruit for His glory!

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The Formula for Healing

In John 9, there is a man who was born blind. The disciples discussed his case in a scholarly fashion, but they didn’t ask about healing. After all, he was BORN blind.   The text doesn’t say, but perhaps he didn’t even have normal eyes–it was a birth defect, after all. Later in the chapter, his neighbors questioned whether this was the same man, so he apparently looked quite different to them.   This was an impossible handicap, one that no one ever expected to be changed.

The disciples were simply curious about the cause of the problem—neither they nor the man himself asked anything more.   But Jesus could see beyond this hopeless case. He saw a man who needed wholeness, and He saw a way to show the glory of God. In this case, he couldn’t restore sight, because it had never been there, but he could create sight where none had existed before, because He is the light of the world.

The Light could enter the utter darkness of this man’s eyes.

After this man was given his sight, the Pharisees became very interested, of course. They especially wanted to know how it happened.   Being told that Jesus made mud, they seized on that. He had made mud on the Sabbath—he couldn’t possibly be from God. The laws that men had established to uphold the Sabbath had been broken, so this man was a lawbreaker. They questioned the man repeatedly about the exact method that Jesus used. They didn’t care that He had accomplished something unheard of—unthought of—by giving sight to one who had never seen…the Pharisees were far more concerned about the method used.   The man Jesus had made mud.

This is the only time that Scripture records Jesus making mud. A few other times, Jesus used His saliva to heal both the blind and the deaf/mute.  Sometimes, though, He only touched them. Once, he restored a man’s sight in two steps—first very vague and limited vision, and a bit later, he could see perfectly. In fact, if you look at all the healings of Jesus, it is amazing how many different methods He used. Many times He simply spoke the word—Be healed. Sometimes He asked, “Do you believe?” or “Do you want to be healed?” but this man who was born blind never asked for healing at all. Several times Jesus healed a person from afar, without ever seeing them—the centurion’s servant, the nobleman’s son; many times he simply touched them—Peter’s mother-in-law, the high priest’s servant.   A number of people were healed simply by touching His clothes, seemingly with no effort on His part at all. But this day, He took some time. He spit on the dirt, made the mud, and put it on the man’s eyes. He also told this man to wash in the pool of Siloam and when he had done that, he regained his sight.   But there was another man at another pool who was simply told to get up and walk. There was no need for the washing in that case. The variety of ways that Jesus healed is really quite surprising.

And the Pharisees wanted to know how. They knew who, or thought they did. An interloper, an intruder, an intractable imposter was swaying the mind of the people, and He needed to be stopped. The only question was how. They fixated on the method and completely disdained the Man.

Do we tend to focus more on the method than we do on the Man? Are we looking for a formula—the foolproof way to achieve healing or happiness or wholeness—rather than simply trusting in the Man? I believe that Jesus’ use of so many different methods of healing was a reminder to us that there is no formula. He works in so many different ways, and just as He created each human being unique, He also has a unique plan for each of us. His shaping, His healing for me will look different than what He has planned for you. God gives each of us our own challenges, and the way we walk them out will be different than any other person’s way. The formula is not a process.

The Formula is a Person.

Give up trying to find the bullet points—the six steps to wholeness, the perfect plan for healing, the one-size-fits-all cure for your pain. Jesus had a slightly different agenda for each person He encountered, and He has a personal and individual plan for you. The only way to discover it is to follow Him, to pay attention, do what He says, and trust that His way for you is perfect. It probably won’t look like anyone else’s path. It may not look like you expect. It may not even be what you think you want, but it is the perfect route, the one God has prepared in advance, for your feet to walk.

Jesus is your Way to Wholeness.

Follow Him.

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